Friday, October 7, 2011


My oldest grandson (and Mom & Dad's oldest great-grandson!) turned 2 years old today.  Time has flown by so quickly!  What a great time we had at the St. Louis zoo today!  Kristopher was so excited about all the different animals.  Seeing new things through the eyes of a child makes you look at the world in a whole new way.  What an experience!

Physically, today was draining.  So much walking & carrying around a 35 pound bundle of joy!  But it was well worth it.  

Today was also my youngest grandson, Jayden's, birthday.  He is one month old today.  I got to spend the day with him yesterday and was able to get a little snuggle time in with him today as well.  What a special day!  I just wish Mom & Dad could have shared it with us.  How they loved their family!

Sometimes I feel that my family has fallen apart.  Since we were gone today Kristopher's official birthday dinner will be tomorrow evening.  It will just be Kristopher, my daughter Stacie, my son, his girlfriend and me.  My oldest daughter, her husband, and their baby won't be able to come.

It seemed that when I was growing up we always had huge birthday dinners.  My brothers all live so far away now that we just don't get together.  Even when Mom & Dad were alive we rarely all got together.  I feel that now that they are gone we may never all get together again. 

I wonder how Kristopher will view his family.  He has no grandfathers and I am the only grandmother in his life.  How will I be able to keep my family together?  What kind of memories will I be able to leave my grandchildren?

I know I can't wallow in self-pity.  I have to just keep moving on and make the most of every moment.  I can't drum up a fake family but I can give them my love and do my best to show them way to the Perfect Father.

John 17:20-23 (The Message)
I'm praying not only for them
   But also for those who will believe in me
   Because of them and their witness about me.
   The goal is for all of them to become one heart and mind—
   Just as you, Father, are in me and I in you,
   So they might be one heart and mind with us.
   Then the world might believe that you, in fact, sent me.
   The same glory you gave me, I gave them,
   So they'll be as unified and together as we are—
   I in them and you in me.
   Then they'll be mature in this oneness,
   And give the godless world evidence
   That you've sent me and loved them
   In the same way you've loved me.

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