As I watched him often times looking smug while his attorney was talking I began to feel some awful things welling up inside of me. I reminded myself that he really is just a kid. He was only 23 at the time of the murder. He is a drug addict. He did not grow up in a loving home. He has issues. Lord, let me forgive him!
I think of so many of the young ladies in my Bible study at the jail. Many of them bring the same sort of scenarios. I encourage them. I remind them of how much God loves and forgives them. They must forgive themselves. As these thoughts ramble through my mind, I see the difference. They have admitted their guilt. They are not fighting to prove a lie.
I think that was what bothered me about the jury selection and why I felt so bad for the jurors who had been called as well as the 15 (12 jurors and 3 alternates) who have to put their entire lives on hold and listen to sometimes boring but, more often, gruesome evidence. Assuming he is guilty, if only he would "man up" and admit his wrongdoing we wouldn't have to go through all this.
When the most gruesome pictures were shown I did not look at them. Instead I focused on Jose. He looked right at the ones of Dad but when they showed the ones of Mom, he blinked a lot, looked down or away. It seemed to bother him. Was I reading too much into his body language? Perhaps. After all, I only had a side view of him. So many questions in my mind.
Please join me in praying for justice. If he is guilty, may he be convicted. If he is innocent, may he be set free. We may never really know what happened but one thing I do know, Mom and Dad are walking streets of gold! They are praising our Lord and Savior. They have no more pain. No more worries or concerns. They have laid up their treasures in heaven.
Matthew 6:19-21 (The Message)
Don't hoard treasure down here where it gets eaten by moths and corroded by rust or-worse!-stolen by burglars. Stockpile treasure in heaven, where it's safe from moth and rust and burglars. It's obvious, isn't it? The place where your treasure is, is the place you will most want to be, and end up being.
Mom and Dad spent a lifetime stockpiling treasures in heaven. It is the place they most wanted to be and they wanted to take as many people with them as possible!
What about you? Where are your treasures? Where do you most want to be? Oh, my friend, if you do not know the love of Jesus, allow me to introduce you! You will never regret giving your life over to him! Don't go off on some wild goose chase. Jesus is standing at your door gently knocking. Won't you let him in before it is too late?
Colossians 2:2-4 (The Message)
I want you woven into a tapestry of love, in touch with everything there is to know of God. Then you will have minds confident and at rest, focused on Christ, God's great mystery. All the richest treasures of wisdom and knowledge are embedded in that mystery and nowhere else. And we've been shown the mystery! I'm telling you this because I don't want anyone leading you off on some wild-goose chase, after other so-called mysteries or "the Secret".